Cheater On Life

”I think it’s time for me to tell my story”,

I told you this in all the conversations I’ve made inside my head,

None of them you know anything of.

I think it’s time for me to follow my calling

I think it’s high time to drop that mask, wall, hole

Whatever.

If life were a game of chess I would have found the shortcut

I would have found a way to cheat

‘Cause I am a cheater on life.

I cheat on everyone I know with pretending I am something that I’m not.

Truth is, I love to cheat on the rules

People get bored because they work hard

I just play…play them.

This is me, I am a cheater on life

And I feel good about it.       

Let’s make new rules.

Lots of love,

Mădălina Dan

 

Image source: https://www.youtube.com/

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What it takes to be yourself?

 

”Once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

– Margery Williams

 

Hello, dear readers!

I read yesterday a story called “The Velveteen Rabbit” and I wanted to share with you a short paragraph from it. In my eyes, it’s about becoming authentic in life. I will let the paragraph speak for itself. Enjoy 🙂

“What is REAL?” “Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.

“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”

“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”

“It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

― Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit

Lots of love and always remember – be authentic each passing day. You can never get ugly, only more beautiful.

Hugs,

Mădălina Dan

Shaped in the wrong way

Since we were little we had been taught about the things we should not speak about. Whenever there was something painful we learned to stuff it back down. Shut up and never talk about it ever again…and then we grew up, carrying these wounds of not opening up in our future relationships, jobs, and families. We did not become people, we became walls that others could lean on, always perfect and polished, without a single care in the world. The truth was – we weren’t. We were broken and afraid and crazy and hurt just like everybody else. The only difference was that we did not have the courage to ask for help. We did not have the courage to open up, speak the truth and be vulnerable. We were perfect paper dolls, especially us girls…and men were superheroes, never shedding a tear in their life. We lived these lies, hid from the world, never finding the peace that we were looking for because we closed ourselves behind the doors. We cut ourselves from the true beauty of this world – from experiencing pain and heartbreak, from vulnerability and true connection. That’s why we were hurt in the first place: society made us become that – people living in a world of pain.

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Looking in retrospect, growing up was never about hiding, as we initially thought. It was about unbecoming, it was about going on a journey toward finding ourselves. Coming back to love and freedom and understanding, forgetting everything society told us to be and becoming who we really are. Maybe the answer was not having all the answers, but learning to live with more questions…and just simply sharing our story, because sometimes one story can change the world.

 

How to describe a kiss

This is a poem about my writing process and the moments when the voice inside my head gets really annoying. Trying an failing, ups and downs, an inner critic that never stops- that’s how I see it. When you get to the finish line it’s all worth it, but the process can be tiring sometimes. Enjoy 🙂

”Describe a kiss” –  inner critic whispers
My voice is trembling with anticipation
“What did she want me to say?”
I feel the heart in my chest “tum, tum, tum”
“Blah, blah, blah” my mind responds
“Describe a kiss”, yeah right, I know
Worst poetry
An intertwining of lips, crushing of stars
No, erase.
Eyes melting into each other, lips caressing, getting so close that there’s no more distance for air
Erase.
”Describe a kiss”
Well, with him is only cigarette smoke on redness, the taste of dreams at twilight
Sunlight caving in, puzzle solving itself out
Grenade, explosion, canvas with emptiness suddenly full of blistering colours
Erase.
”Describe a kiss”
A song, metal maybe? I know -something symphonic
Instrumental, piano notes carried by the wind
Chirping of birds, the peace of nature,
Leaves rustling, the sound of cars in the distance
Background noise
Erase.
”Describe a kiss”
Myself drowning in water, being somewhere I’m not supposed to, but liking it anyway
Gasping for air, reaching the shoreline
Toes anchored in the sand, waves hitting my body
That’s how I describe a kiss.